The CORE

I have heard that ‘everyone, deep within, is actually unhappy’.

I have been a constant observer. An observer to people and to myself. Everyone basically wears a mask, a mask of the person they want to be. I truly believe that there is not just one world existent. Every person lives in a different world, the world they choose to be in. Worlds that can be completely different.They look like they know what they are doing and are sure of themselves. But they are just forcing themselves to believe so.

 All the people around me, every single one of them has an innocent helpless child within them, a child desperate for love and understanding. I have seen through their masks and it brings in me compassion and sadness. Everyone’s past has harmed them, in ways that they are aware or unaware of. Their past wounds never really heal. Some people focus on the pain and live a life of visible misery, some ignore it and try to cover it up by using some or the other defense mechanism. Because the hurt is in the subconscious, only people who put in some time and effort to know themselves realize that hurt still lingers in them. And this pain makes them the people they are. The pain rules their actions, behavior and mentality. This is what I see and what I believe.
But, is the saying completely true? Is this pain and unhappiness their core? I do not believe so. I have read in spiritual books that ‘joy’ is the core of every being. The innate nature of every living thing is to be happy. And I strongly believe this too. The soul cannot be negative. And the body that houses the soul is matter, which is finally just concentrated energy. Life energy. Positive energy.
I, for one, am aware of the complexity in me. The introspection I do has shown me the numerous parts to myself. Parts that are different, and at times, contradictory to one another. I have seen the part who is the hurt, insecure child. I have seen the joyous, fulfilled spirit. Each equally intense as the other.

 I do not know which is the ‘real’ me. All of it is me. What is the core then? Joy or pain? Or is it neither? Is the core just neutral and unagitated? I do not know. But I would like to believe that it’s joy. And live joyfully. Live it and spread it. Because I feel that being happy is the best way I can thank the Universe for all that it has given me. And no matter what, I am grateful for all that is in and around me.

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