Me, the Child
As I have mentioned in one of my earlier posts, I have been growing younger mentally for more than a year now…
I think I am almost at its peak now, so wanted to tell out my view from here.
My emotions are very intense. When I am happy, I am extremely happy..when I am sad, I am extremely sad..and this applies to all other emotions too. Moods swings happen without a warning. I derive happiness from the smallest and almost ‘meaningless’ things. I get these cravings suddenly, where I want things that are totally out of the random. eg. green bangles, tiny yellow flower, a kiss etc. And when I do get them, so much of joy starts filling up in me that everything and everyone in the world seem beautiful to me. Every color seems ever so intense and vibrating with energy, every smell takes me to ecstasy.
There are times when I suddenly start singing and dancing, not bothering about people around and what they would think of me. Without much thought, I simply start doing anything that I feel like. Sometimes, this bubbly and enthusiastic nature of mine lifts their moods, so they too join me. Then there is only happiness and positivity around in the air.
I have the curiosity of a child too. I think that is my most profound trait. I constantly want to know how things are, why things are the way they are, and why not otherwise? I am not one bit shy in inquiring and asking the silliest of questions. Sometimes everything seems like magic…
And oh yes, talking gibberish to someone, whom I am comfortable with, comes without effort to me. I derive immense joy from it. When I meet someone who can talk to mine back in the same way, I feel even more happy! Sometimes I even sit and talk to myself…jamunu vilashi naal finosht ganini pushku
But….being this child has its own difficult parts too..I find it difficult to carry out the adult-world tasks. Like meeting project deadlines (I tend to whatever I feel like doing at any given moment, that is applicable to work as well), being committed in a relationship (if someone does not make me happy when I am low, or if they bring down the enthusiasm in me when I am happy, I tend to turn to another person), being diplomatic while talking to people ( I tend to say out whatever I truly feel about a subject), adjusting with any kind of people (if I am in the company of someone boring/ unhappy/ negative/ artificial, after a while I tend to walk away from them)….etc. To control these tendencies is a struggle.
Bringing out your inner child seems to be a wonderful thing in spiritual terms, but you have to act like an adult to survive in this screwed up world. Balancing the child and adult parts is getting very difficult and confusing for me…
I think I am almost at its peak now, so wanted to tell out my view from here.
My emotions are very intense. When I am happy, I am extremely happy..when I am sad, I am extremely sad..and this applies to all other emotions too. Moods swings happen without a warning. I derive happiness from the smallest and almost ‘meaningless’ things. I get these cravings suddenly, where I want things that are totally out of the random. eg. green bangles, tiny yellow flower, a kiss etc. And when I do get them, so much of joy starts filling up in me that everything and everyone in the world seem beautiful to me. Every color seems ever so intense and vibrating with energy, every smell takes me to ecstasy.
There are times when I suddenly start singing and dancing, not bothering about people around and what they would think of me. Without much thought, I simply start doing anything that I feel like. Sometimes, this bubbly and enthusiastic nature of mine lifts their moods, so they too join me. Then there is only happiness and positivity around in the air.
I have the curiosity of a child too. I think that is my most profound trait. I constantly want to know how things are, why things are the way they are, and why not otherwise? I am not one bit shy in inquiring and asking the silliest of questions. Sometimes everything seems like magic…
And oh yes, talking gibberish to someone, whom I am comfortable with, comes without effort to me. I derive immense joy from it. When I meet someone who can talk to mine back in the same way, I feel even more happy! Sometimes I even sit and talk to myself…jamunu vilashi naal finosht ganini pushku
But….being this child has its own difficult parts too..I find it difficult to carry out the adult-world tasks. Like meeting project deadlines (I tend to whatever I feel like doing at any given moment, that is applicable to work as well), being committed in a relationship (if someone does not make me happy when I am low, or if they bring down the enthusiasm in me when I am happy, I tend to turn to another person), being diplomatic while talking to people ( I tend to say out whatever I truly feel about a subject), adjusting with any kind of people (if I am in the company of someone boring/ unhappy/ negative/ artificial, after a while I tend to walk away from them)….etc. To control these tendencies is a struggle.
Bringing out your inner child seems to be a wonderful thing in spiritual terms, but you have to act like an adult to survive in this screwed up world. Balancing the child and adult parts is getting very difficult and confusing for me…
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